5 Things I’ve Learned In My First Year of Marriage

In a little over a month my husband, Brandon, and I will have been married for one year. As someone who is still a newly wed I know I still have a lot of lessons left to learn, but I feel I have also learned so much in this first year.

1.) You can’t be embarrassed in marriage

You can’t hide your messes in marriage.Sure, you can avoid doing certain things in front of your spouse (burping, farting, having to go to the bathroom at weird times, etc) for awhile. Eventually, though, you will do something that you told yourself you would never do in front of your spouse. Remember, you live together all of the time. There is only so much you can hide until you can’t hide anymore. You can spend your life trying to avoid embarrassment, or you can accept the fact that you are a human, you make mistakes, and just laugh about it. If I gave myself a nickel every time I did something embarrassing, I would have an entire bag of nickels. Instead of crying in embarrassment, Brandon and I have instead laughed about them. Seriously, laughter is much more fun than hiding.

2.) Don’t compare your life to others

In all likelihood, suddenly everyone you know is either getting engaged, getting married, buying a house, or having a baby. With so many life changes, it can feel like the pressure is on to keep up. First comes love, then comes marriage… If you’re like me and every other newlywed I know, you will be asked The Baby Question almost from the moment you say “I do.” Once you’re married, your family and coworkers all want to know when you will be moving on to the next step. Every relationship and every circumstance is different. You can only do what’s right for you.

3.) The best things in life are free.

We are both college students, and like most college kids we are poor. Despite being poor we always have fun, and are able to show each other we love each other. One my favorite dates we have been on was where we went window shopping at the mall, went to Costco to eat free samples, and than went and used a coupon we had to split an ice cream with each other. On our six month anniversary we both knew we wouldn’t be able to afford any gifts but that didn’t stop my husband, and I came home from work to find a bouquet of flowers he had picked for me. It was the best gift he could have given me. I do love when we get to have a night out on the town or when he buys me a gift; however, my favorite memories usually involve us just snuggling up on the couch to watch a movie, or giving or receiving a thoughtful gift.

4.) Ditch your gadgets and the cyber world when spending time together.

For along time I started to get into the habit of being on the computer or Facebook when we would watch a movie together. Brandon would tell me to come over and snuggle with him and I would say to give me a minute. Well, a minute seemed to turn into an hour and by the time I was done we would start snuggling halfway through the movie. One time when I told Brandon to give me a minute, I could tell he was a little hurt. I realized that during our quality time, I was sometimes choosing Facebook over him, and I realized that was messed up. So now when we spend time together, we put the computers and our phones away and we just focus on enjoying the time we have together.

5.) Continue to fall in love with each other

Brad Paisley has a song out called “I Thought I Loved You Then” where he talks about the woman he loves. He goes through some of the important events in their life, and each time feels as if there is no way he could love her more and than the next event happens and he does. In marriage you have to continue choosing to fall in love and make time to do so. You should tell your spouse you love them often and mean it. As cliche as it sounds, continue dating each other and surprise one another occasionally. It doesn’t always take a grand gesture sometimes something as simple as vacuuming or making a treat shows can show him that I love him and appreciate him.

Our first year of marriage has been great so far. I love my husband, and I can’t wait to see what lessons I will learn in the future.

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3 thoughts on “5 Things I’ve Learned In My First Year of Marriage

  1. Thanks Britt you are awesome and I am so happy that we are cousins now 🙂 also we moved recently into a new apartment so if you ever want to come visit and stay with us we have plenty of room and you are welcome here anytime.

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